It is time once again for the weekly College Gameday review. This week’s edition of College Gameday emanated live from Bristol, Tennessee, where we will see the BATTLE FOR BRISTOL between the Tennessee Volunteers and the Virginia Tech Hokies. They are playing the game tonight at Bristol Motor Speedway, where they plan on setting the all-time attendance record for a college football game tonight anticipating 150,000 football/NASCAR/beer fans turning out to celebrate this spectacle. They have built the football field in the infield of the racetrack so that if you are attending this game, you too can watch this exciting game from a quarter mile away. I for one am totally pysched that they chose such an important game between these two long-time heated rivals to attempt this all-time record. Right?
Since they were at the Bristol Motor Speedway today, I expected a lot of NASCAR schtick and they certainly delivered. Desmond Howard claimed to be a HUGE NASCAR FAN, which I’m not sure I totally believe. However, we did get to see video of him riding shotgun during a test drive around the track, because, you know, BRISTOL MOTOR SPEEDWAY!
The last time a football game was played here it was an exhibition game between the Eagles and Redskins in 1961. I can’t imagine watching that game in this setting without THE WORLD’S LARGEST HANGIN VIDEO BOARD over the field to watch.
Everyone has been crapping on this weekend’s schedule of college football after the greatest opening week in college football history, but Rece Davis pointed out early on that FOUR ranked teams lost to unranked opponents the last time there were no ranked-vs-ranked matchups. Bet those dogs everyone.
Speaking of football, they made all of the Saturday morning reporters dress up in racing fire suits for their early reports, because, you know, BRISTOL MOTOR SPEEDWAY! This brings us to the “OFFICIAL @GAMEDAYJEN SAM PONDER OUTFIT OF THE WEEK REVIEW PART 1A” because Sam Ponder first appeared in a fire suit. Gameday Jen said in regards to this outfit, “Why?”
Early on in the show, Gameday presented a segment which is quickly becoming everyone’s favorite weekly staple: WHEN WILL LSU FIRE LES MILES? I guess I’ll just never understand why they want to run him out of town so much. Apparently LSU fans (?) have set up a GoFundMe to buy out Les Miles’ contract. I’m sure we’ll be back next week with another update as this story develops.
We now rejoin the OFFICIAL @GAMEDAYJEN SAM PONDER OUTFIT REVIEW OF THE WEEK PART 1B!!! Sam Ponder appeared again having either done a very quick change out of her fire suit or having recorded that segment yesterday, and this time her outfit was much more well received. Gameday Jen said “I LOVE the outfit! I love the shirt and the skirt!” Well done this week Sam.
Gene Wojciechowski presented a very nice piece on a young autistic man named Bo Paske who befriended FSU player Travis Rudolph. Travis was on a visit to Bo’s school and saw Bo sitting by himself at lunch so he decided to join him, and their friendship was born. It was good stuff, so check out the video below.
My favorite segment, YOU HAD ONE JOB, was back again this week. But no video posted online, so no video for you. Write your local congressmen and let them know we need #YHOJ posted online for the lulz.
They presented a preview from the upcoming Tom Rinaldi interview with Art Briles in which the whole Baylor mess is covered. It was not well received by the crew at Gameday. I don’t exactly know why Art Briles is all over the place putting his face on TV during this time period, because he’s not going to look good when his lawyers have no doubt told him to steer clear of any specifics in these appearances. Maybe someone can explain this to me, but why is a football coach, or the university for that matter, involved in the chain of authorities when a rape is reported? I would think victims in this situation would go straight to the police? Unless there are allegations that I missed of the police being pressured by Baylor’s football program a la the allegations against Jameis Winston and the Tallahassee police department colluding with FSU to cover up alleged crimes.
During this VERY serious discussion on a VERY serious issue, something went wrong with the audio and audio from what sounded like a very light-hearted broadcast was being piped in along with the Gameday audio. Not exactly the BEST time to have someone laughing on this mystery audio track when discussing rape allegations at Baylor.
As the show progressed, we were once again pleased to see what will no doubt be a recurring segment this season: NON-FOOTBALL RELATED CELEBRITY SHOWS UP TO PROVIDE LITTLE-TO-NO INPUT ON THE DAY’S BIG GAME!!! Last week we had Olympic gold medalist Aly Raisman tell us how she excited for the game because her dad and brother “like sports”. This week, racing legend Richard Petty showed up to give Lee Corso a hat and picked “Virginia” to win the game tonight.
“THE GAUNTLET” with George Whitfield returned. I really have nothing more to say about this segment because every week is the same. Sigh.
Bear’s Bank is in full force this week. He went 1-2 with the Bank, but looks to pull at least even with this week’s slate.
Top signs this week include BUTCH JONES TAKES METAMUCIL, and allegations that Butch Jones killed Harambe. Maybe by the end of the season we will get to the bottom of this mystery and find out which college football head coach ACTUALLY killed Harambe. See photo below, top right.
However, this week’s best sign of the week is equally confusing as it is great.
The actual best segment of today’s show was probably the story of James Conner from Pitt. This guy blew out a knee last year, and during knee rehab was found to have cancer. Not only did he beat the cancer, but while taking in chemo and recovering he continued offseason workouts for football. My mind can’t even process how a person does this while going through chemo treatment. He returns today against Penn State. It is a must watch segment.
Now, the time comes for the Gameday crew to get down to business. Dale Earnhardt Jr. joined the crew to pick games today, and he actually seemed pretty knowledgeable. When the time came to pick the day’s big game, Desmond went with the upset in Virginia Tech. Dale Earnhardt Jr. also went with the upset because his fiancee is from Kentucky and said he’d be walking home if he picked Tennessee. Corso trolled the crowd back and forth before out of nowhere a GIGANTIC racing helmet in Volunteer colors showed up for him to put on. @GamedayJen and @TheGamedayBaby both went with Tennessee too, so all three will stay tied for the season no matter who wins tonight.
Enjoy your night!
Welcome back everyone to the return of the College Gameday weekly review. This is of course where all of us with an unhealthy Gameday obsession can celebrate and nit-pick the finer points of this week’s College Gameday celebration as if it were a fine wine we were sampling.
This week’s edition of College Gameday was broadcasting live from Green Bay, Wisconsin, for the big matchup between #1 Alabama and #20 USC. For the first time in 7+ months, we got to be woken up by COMIN’ TO YOUR CITAAAAAY as performed by an ever-expanding cast including Big & Rich, Cowboy Troy, Lzzy Hale, Travie McCoy, and more. At this point, I think every season they should keep adding new performers to this intro, and before long it will basically be the new millennium’s version of “We are the world“. Except, you know, it will be to celebrate a college football pregame show instead of raising money for Africa.
So now that we have been welcomed to their citaaay, let’s not forget that this week 1 has been billed as the greatest opening week of all time in college football history. As athletic directors start to figure out the finer points of this college football playoff deal, all of the contenders are trying to put some legitimate names on their scheduling resumes. Of course, sometimes you go ahead and schedule a cupcake, pay them a couple hundred grand to show up, and then get your ass kicked anyways.
Back to Gameday, as the show opened up and they were introducing the crew, Desmond Howard got quite the ovation by the Packer Nation for his Superbowl MVP performance during his tenure in Green Bay.
Corso and Kirk had a beer to kick the show off.
The rest of the crew was back in full this year, including Chris “The Bear” Fallica as their research lead/gambling aficionado. My wife Jennifer (@GamedayJen) was the first one to point out that they backed way off of the gambling angle this year. Last year they were talking point spreads for the first time ever, and even started picking a few games against the spread. This year there were only glancing mentions of the gambling lines aside from the fantastic return of BEAR’S BANK! Chris Fallica was on FIRE last year picking games against the spread, so pay attention all of you degenerates who need to get down on some last minute bets at 10AM Saturday morning. This week, Bear’s Bank liked UCLA+3, UNC+3, and Texas State+21 vs Ohio. The first two were losers yesterday, but as you can see in the scores pictured above, Texas State showed up as a 21 point dog and decided to beat Ohio on the field and claim the title of fiercest Bobcat mascot in the country.
There was an earthquake late Friday night/early Saturday morning about 50 miles outside of Tulsa, Oklahoma which was discussed. The 5.6 scale earthquake was apparently felt in much of the midwest ranging from Iowa to Texas, or in other words, it was a Big 12 earthquake.
Signs this week were pretty tame, but this year it looks like the memes are going to be dank. Harambe was a big player in the signage yesterday as you can see below.
We also had signs with allegations that Les Miles killed Harambe and Colin Kaepernick killed Harambe. However, a late contender for sign of the week really got a chuckle out of me:
This brings us to everyone’s favorite segment of the week. The “OFFICIAL GAMEDAY JEN REVIEW OF THE SAM PONDER OUTFIT OF THE WEEK”!!! This week Sam Ponder was sporting a nice little outfit of which Gameday Jen had to say: “I like the blazer and the all black. I like the neck-line detail and the shoes are great”. I myself question the pants, which taper sharply at the ankle, as they appear to be a slimmer version of parachute pants. However, since I am the owner of a vast wardrobe of generic polos and ill-fitting pants, I advise you to trust in Sam Ponder’s fashion choices above my own.
The Gameday boys spent an unnecessary amount of time on Saturday’s show discussing the fact that the NCAA had outlawed the Lambeau Leap from the LSU/Wisconsin game. I personally think the football players should be allowed to do it after scoring, but I also think we should go all-in with 1980’s Miami Hurricane’s style celebrations in these games. However, since the rules say no excessive celebrations, I didn’t really think there was a need for any debate, much less suggestions that the coaches should have agreed to decline any excessive celebration penalty after a Lambeau Leap.
Marcus Spears and Kaylee Hartung from the SEC network joined the Gameday crew via satellite to talk about the horrible flooding in Louisiana and the relief efforts which the LSU football program, led by Les Miles, has undertaken. It boggles my mind that the LSU fans, alumni, and boosters want to run Les Miles out of town like a common pygmy. This is a man who wins 10 games a year, won a national championship, and does great work for the community. I guess it doesn’t matter if you’re not beating ‘Bama.
For those of you who follow College Gameday religiously, you will know the man known as Lee Fitting. He is the long-time College Gameday producer who has been behind the wheel of this thing for all six of their Emmy awards. After 12 years, and one week into his 13th season, he will be leaving the show to be in charge of all college sports at ESPN. They showed a tribute to Lee, and it is a shame that we will be missing him going forward, but we wish him all of the luck in the world.
David Pollack wore a grill as payoff from a bet with Houston coach Tom Herman from last season. He looks… special.
Olympic gold medalist Aly Raisman showed up on College Gameday for some reason. I assumed there would be some kind of tie-in to LSU, Wisconsin, Green Bay, or one of the players to explain her presence, but if there was I didn’t see it. She had little to contribute to the football-centric nature of the show aside from her brother and dad “liking sports”. Oh well, USA! USA! USA!
Combined with Aly Raisman’s appearance, we saw the continuation of what will hopefully be a great tradition for years to come. The second annual David Pollack vertical leap challenge! This year he succeeded again, but managed to rip his pants. Truly compelling television. This needs to be back next year.
A cool segment followed by Tom Rinaldi about unorthodox offseason training which some programs are starting to get into. Many teams are starting to send their students through EXTREME workouts like military style bootcamps to build toughness and teamwork. It looked really cool. I’m allowed to say that sitting here on the couch in my underwear eating a churro.
I’m proud to say we also saw the return of BEATNIK POETRY WITH TOM RINALDI!!! This week he had a spoken word performance entitled “I AM LAMBEAU” about the experiences of the living, breathing nature of Lambeau field. Or something.
Other miscellaneous notes include QB Guru George Whitfield showing up to break down QB footwork film while walking through a crowd with Rece Davis. I still don’t get this segment. I mean, I’m sure George is very good at what he does, but why do they need to be walking through the crowd every time?
Gene Wojciechowski had a weird animated piece about Jim Harbaugh’s offseason, which he called his offseason bucket list. Harbaugh was everywhere: conducting an orchestra, rapping, coaching 1st base for the Detroit Tigers, Disneyland with Jerry Springer, hanging out with Chewbacca, and tweeting nonstop. Oh yeah he did some recruiting too.
Everyone’s favorite segment #YOUHADONEJOB was back. I don’t have any video to show you because ESPN hasn’t put this online as far as I’m aware. So how about a picture of Rich Rodriguez re-enacting a scene from Gladiator.
The Lambeau Field executive chef showed up with a ridiculous spread of food including bacon wrapped baked potatoes and foot long bratwurst. Desmond once again let us know he is NOT HAVING THE PORK. Anyways, we can probably find a use for this picture somewhere down the line.
At this point, after a very busy show, it was time to get down to business and make some damn picks. Aaron Rodgers was the special guest this week to make picks with the Gameday crew. He put on his nicest white undershirt this morning for his TV appearance, and seemed like not only had he just woken up, but that he probably doesn’t watch college football. To nobody’s surprise, David Pollack, Kirk Herbstreit, and Desmond Howard picked LSU in the day’s big game, while Rodgers picked Wisconsin. Corso donned an the LSU headgear complete with a cheesehead for fun as he picked the Bayeux Bengals to win in this game.
@GamedayJen picked LSU as well as the show completed, and we had one more pick to get on the record. This year we are proud to announce we have been joined by @TheGamedayBaby who will be making a weekly pick and spouting off hot sports takes. The Gameday Baby went with the LSU Tigers as well, making Aaron Rodgers the only person I have on record as picking Wisconsin, in one of the most lopsided picks I’ve ever tracked which ended up being right. Check back tomorrow night for a full slate of the results to see who won this week, who lost this week, and how your favorite (or most hated) personality did.
Welcome back football fans to our way-too-late edition of the week 10 College Gameday review. Today’s edition of College Gameday was comin’ to your citaaay live from Tuscaloosa, Alabama for the matchup between #2 LSU and #4 Alabama. Given the fact that this was the third Alabama game of the year featuring Alabama, I feel that the show may be better titled Alabama Gameday presented by ESPN. The crowd was pretty small this morning at Gameday, which can be attributed to the rain, or more likely the fact that Alabama fans don’t care to show up anymore when they get Gameday once a month.
Since we are already in the middle of bagging on this morning’s crowd in Tuscaloosa, let’s go ahead and get signs over with. The signs this morning were probably the weakest of the season so far. We had a lot of corn dog discussion, a “We want Memphis!” sign, and “Les Miles likes being the little spoon”. Since the signs from this morning sucked, I am going to rule no winner this week and instead feature the following:
Speaking of Comin’ to your Citaaaay, I still get a lot of traffic from people wondering who the woman is in the latest edition of the College Gameday intro. For those who need to know, she is Lzzy Hale from the band Halestorm.
An odd discussion broke out early in today’s show when Kirk Herbstreit informed us that Chris Fallica is a savant when it comes to 1980s professional wrestling talent. Fallica admitted this is “one of many” problems he has. Now, I’m not going to sit here and pretend that in 8th grade my plan for life wasn’t to become a professional wrestler, but there was probably a little more discussion of 1980s WWF talent than one would hope for on College Gameday.
Alright now that I’ve bagged on this morning’s show a little bit, let’s turn this review around. The show got back on track this morning with the WEEK 10 SAMANTHA PONDER OUTFIT OF THE WEEK REVIEW BY @GAMEDAYJEN!!!! Jennifer was a big fan of the look today, stating “I really liked the sweater and the rain boots, and I also liked her hair today!” Follow @GamedayJen for all of your college football fashion-related news and opinions.
Sam Ponder had her usual Cheeze-It Real Fan of the Week segment mid-show today, and it was one of the more bizarre Cheeze-It related segments in recent memory. Sam was interviewing some girl who won this week’s contest, and spent about two full minutes interviewing this girl as she proceeded to explain how she painted the letter A on her own face. I haven’t ever painted an A on my face, but I can’t imagine there is THAT much to it.
George Whitfield joined Rece Davis for this week’s casual walking segment while they break down quarterback play in college football. They put on rain boots because the ground was a big mess of mud and puddles, and the highlight of this segment was George Whitfield making a joke referencing Gameday producer Lee Fitting by saying the boots were “Air Fittings”. He was pretty impressed with his joke, as I am sure you are too.
Now let’s stop down because it is time for VIDEOS!!!!
-The story of Clemson Co-Offensive Coordinator Tony Elliott can be found HERE. It details the story of how he lost his mother in a tragic car accident at age 9, went on to become a standout football player, earned a scholarship to Clemson, and in 2002 reunited with Dabo Swinney to join the Clemson staff. I give this segment an A.
-Sam Ponder and David Pollack were back for another zany week of #YouHadOneJob. This has gone from a highlight reel of epic fails to a highlight video of the week’s funny happenings, but I still support it and so should you. SUPPORT IT HERE!!!
-The story of the day was without a doubt Tom Rinaldi’s piece on Sid Ortis. Sid was a youngster who grew up in Alabama as a die-hard LSU fan. Rinaldi has been up and down this year with his emotionally targeted stories, but this one is an A+++. Words can’t really do it justice, so just go WATCH IT HERE!!! Les Miles is featured in it heavily and he is a true orator for the ages. Once upon a time around 2007, a youthful, angry, and possibly inebriated Gameday Cole was the biggest detractor of Les Miles you could find. I didn’t like how he handled all of the Michigan head coaching opening speculation among other things, but this man has grown on me in a big way over the last few years.
As we neared the end of the show, we found out the day’s guest celebrity picker was going to be none other than rap music mogul Rick Ross. They had teased this yesterday as “going to be huge with the kids” and “like no other picker before”. But before we get to the Corso and Ross’ antics, let’s stop down for some Nana Puddin’.
Ok that was yummy. Back to Gameday. When it came time for Rick Ross to disembark the Gameday bus, there is a slight chance that the cameraman was just told that Rick Ross was a big black guy, because the focus was stuck on Rick Ross’ bodyguard for an unusual amount of time before Ross debuted.
Upon joining the Gameday desk, Rick Ross was presented with a gift of pears by Lee Corso as a reference to the following:
If you told me Lee Corso, wearing a fake beard/sunglasses/gold jewelry, would be gifting pears to Rick Ross because of a popular Vine post this year on Gameday, I am not sure I would have believed you before today.
When it came time to get down to the business of picking games, Rick Ross had some fantastic input on the games of the day. He was dropping QB names right and left, but also let us know that he picked TCU because “Boykin is bossin’ up” (whatever that means, since I’m white), and that he really liked Memphis in today’s game because he owns a few of Wingstops in Memphis (and I like wings). As the final pick approached, we can review the Bama/LSU picks so far. David Pollack and Chris ‘The Bear’ Fallica both picked Alabama. Desmond and Kirk both went with LSU in today’s game, and to nobody’s surprise Rick Ross took Alabama. As we all know, Corso is in love with the Alabama headgear. It is surely amongst his favorites, which include the Oregon Duck, Notre Dame Leprechaun, and the FSU headdress. He got the crowd riled up with Sweet Home Alabama, before issuing a ROLL TIGERS and popping on the Bayeux Bengals headgear, which had been modified with a Leonard Fournette beard and Leonard Fournette mouthgear. A really fun end to a show which got off to a rough start this morning. Enjoy your day and have a happy football!